Thursday, February 19, 2009

Today was our follow up appointment at the fertility doctor. We had taken a few tests and the doctor was going over the results. My blood work shows that there is something wrong with my ovaries (I've known that for several years) but thankfully I found out I am not diabetic (and I'm doubting now that I'm even pre diabetic like I've been told before). Not to go into all the gory details, we have a very very very small chance of getting pregnant on our own. And that's not including my problems. So right now our only option is In Vitro Fertilization. For those of you not in infertility land, that's where they take some of my eggs out, take some of hubby's swimmers and put them together in a little petri dish. And that's how babies are made. None of that Birds and Bees stuff here. The cost for this procedure is (not including the medicines and ultrasounds) is a little less than $10,000. So with everything included it will come out to anywhere between $10-15,000. That's per cycle. Did I mention insurance pays absolutely nothing? The chances of it working, about 30% (they could be higher since we are healthy and young but we also got diagnosed as infertile so you never know). The odds are not really in our favor. So now that we know the results we have a few options. Option 1, we live childless. Ok so that's not really an option here. Option 2, we go through in vitro fertilization, hope and pray that it works and fork out a ton of money that could be used for option 3. Option 3, we adopt. We are still debating between 2 and 3 and weighing the pros and cons. I've wanted to adopt for such a long time but now that it's one of only 2 options, it's a little hard to accept. I know there are so many children out there that need loving parents and homes to be in. And I know I would love them like they were my own and they would become my own, but I always thought it was going to be a choice we made, not something we were forced into. I'm going to start doing some more research into adoption and find out more. Luckily, my work started a new adoption program and they actually pay for up to $5000 of the adoption. So I'm leaning a little more towards that option. So, all prayers right now would be greatly appreciated. We're both still really emotional about this and need extra help to get through this hard time. But here is a picture of words that can be put on a onesie and this is exactly how I feel about adoption.



7 comments:

Shellee said...

I don't want to seem like a stalker but I couldn't help commenting on this - having gone through it, my heart goes out to you both. There is definitely a grieving process when you find out you can't have kids the "natural" way. We wish you two all of the best no matter what you decide, infertility is a long and hard road.

We are hoping to finalize adoption for our little girl next week. If you ever have questions or need to talk, let us know. Great that your work helps with adoption costs! There is also a tax credit you could check into if that's what you decide to do...Best of luck!

Kaleo & Shellee

Denise said...

My prayers are with you. I am with shellee, there is a grieving process and it is okay to be emotional and a little depressed right now.
You have a hard decision ahead of you but you also have the lord, family and friends to support you. You are not alone. Things don't always turn out how you thought they would but they do turn out perfect, eventually. Hang in there and good luck.

Shannon said...

adoption is something that David and I were considering too. My sister-in-law's brother adopted a baby a year ago...a black baby...so adorable! There is a big need for adoptions of minority children...and the fees aren't as much either. Beautiful children. Some day it would be nice to adopt...but we were surprised and excited to find out we could have our own children after trying and finding out it might not be possible. I'm rooting for you!

Cori said...

I completely feel for you.I'm sorry you and your husband have had this struggle, I knew this pain for a short time and I really wish you the best and you will definitely be in our family's prayers! I'm sure you and your husband will make the right decisions for yourselves. Genetics doesn't make a parent, my husband met my son when he was 2 days old and he is DADDY to him forever...the forever part is what matters : ) I'll be thinking of you!

Yankee Girl said...

We are all sending you our prayers.

Adam and Jessica Cooley said...

That is so sweet. I love the onesie. I can't imagine what you have been going through, but I can say that we will keep you in our prayers. I know you will be blessed either way you choose. Children were meant to grace your home one way or the other!! I know the church adoption agency is a great tool...let us know if you need ANYTHING!!!

Laydee said...

I've always believed that if a child was meant to be yours it didn't matter how it got there. if you and robby are both willing to adopt that is something amazing, some people just aren't. i think that adopting and getting a child is just a great a miracle as one growing in you ( without getting sick!! ) either way, you'll make a great mommy and i hope you get your babies soon!